Brawls, Boobs, Beards, Barbells, & Bacon

Introduction

In 1996, Chuck Palahniuk’s novel, Fight Club was released, and was later turned into a film by the same name starring Brad Pitt and Edward Norton. The book and film are gritty, grimy, graphic and very disturbing. Through and through the book is nihilistic and dark. Despite how graphic the story is, it’s actually deceptively cleaver, and unfortunately and probably unknowing, certainly horrifyingly, one of the best reflections of our times over the last thirty years.

In some respects, it can be seen as a modern-day “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde,” with the unnamed protagonist and his alter-ego Tyler Durden battling it out for supremacy. It functions as an economic commentary, a political commentary, and most importantly for our purposes, as a cultural commentary – which it shouldn’t go unnoticed that man demands an integration point and that all of those lines intersect.

The warning contained in the book is really a summation of the book,

“Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all that claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think every thing you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told to want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned.” 

“If you don’t claim your humanity you will be a statistic.”

The book really isn’t about claiming one’s humanity…it’s not about humanity in general, but is specifically about men. About men finding meaning and purpose…finding a cause outside of themselves, finding a tribe where they fit, and about having dominion.

However, the answer provided in the book is to abandon the flesh through the flesh, which is the idiocy of all idolatry. Which is to abandon meaninglessness, ultimately for another form of meaninglessness which ends up being equally destructive and soul numbing but feels good at first because there is the appearance of direction and dominion because it seeks to destroy what is in order to usher in a new humanity. But as we’ve seen, over the last several years this only perpetuates more destruction…in fact, chaos is the end, as this line illustrates,

“Only after disaster can we be resurrected. It's only after you've lost everything that you're free to do anything. Nothing is static, everything is evolving, everything is falling apart.” 

If nothing is static, and everything is evolving and everything is falling apart than your modus operandi is disaster and never resurrection – always death and never life…or perhaps, always winter and never Christmas.

This is a very disturbing story, but it does a brilliant job of illustrating what can happen to a generation of men raised by women, raised by public schools, raised by the media and raised on a steady diet of prescription drugs. Looking for some form of meaning and purpose, for some vision and direction, looking for some initiation into the village, but all they have gotten is medicated and marketed too. And the pills and purchases have only left them empty and pissed off.

In the words of Tyler Durden,

“We’re the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War’s a spiritual war… our Great Depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off.”

Again, another truth bomb for the mouth of Tyler Durden, which is something that the

evangelical church just cannot or will come to terms with,

“We're a generation of men raised by women. I'm wondering if another woman is really the answer we need.” Tyler Durden

Doug Wilson points this out in his book “Father Hunger” reflecting upon the appearance of God the Father, in William Young’s, The Shack. He says,

“Meet God the Father Almighty, maker of Heaven and earth. Young is by is by no means a dunce – he is very clear that this is just an appearance, an accommodation. But the image, the metaphor, the feel of this whole book, is warm and maternal, cozy and nonthreatening. The center of the discussions is the kitchen. The need is a deep father hunger, but this is not met by a father, but by the enveloping warmth of a comfort mama who makes a lot of comfort food. This symbolism is not incidental to the message of the book. It is the central message of the book. You need a father? Here, talk to your mother about it.”

Men are lonely, isolated, depressed, without vision and direction in a world that seemingly hates them for being men. Fight Club offers a tribe, but that of cobelligerents. It offers a solution to materialism, namely asceticism. It offers freedom from the machine, namely, destroy it and build another…machine.

The African proverb is true. If boys are not initiated into the village they will burn it down just to feel the warmth. But then what? They burned it down because they were not welcomed into it, nor did they have a clear vision of what it could be – if that were the case they would have built one. Now, they are just destroyers…what then? Move on to next village I guess. They might have some monuments to topple.

The point being, that masculinity is not something that can be ignored, or covered up or changed or isolated. As the famous line in Jurassic Park goes, “life finds a way.” So then, if masculinity cannot be disregarded or destroyed, what can it be? Well, directed and discipled.

Brawls, Boobs, Beards, Barbells and Bacon

We are living through the most peculiar of times. Times that are unique to all times, in that, men are perceived to be the root cause of all the problems in the world. Well, if men and masculinity are what’s wrong with the world, then how do you make it right? Ironically, those who would deny such a static thing as male and female, are absolutely committed to removing anything that would resemble the “male” in our culture, or if you will, anything that is distinctively masculine (again, assuming such a thing, that was just denied by them.)

Given that men are the problem, the solution to fixing all said problems in the world is to

feminize them. But one has to ask the question, has the feminization of the American male solved any problems, or just created more? Has a generation of men raised by women been a good thing? In trying to transform masculinity into that which is feminine, have we succeeded or just corrupted what was already there.

Masculine strength is an unavoidable thing. It will either be used to build up or to tear down. In defining all masculine strength as abusive, what we’ve actually done is opened the flood gate to that which is actually abusive by removing the one thing that is baked into the cake to stop said abuses.

What we’ve ended up with is a lot of men who now act like women by using their strength in a passive aggressive, manipulative way, like having Scar as king instead of Mufasa. Feminizing the American male has liberated women to such a degree that women are freely objectified through Hollywood, porn, trafficking, abortion on demand, and women in the workplace so they can provide for themselves and their live-in boyfriends. Take that patriarchy.

But life always finds a way and nature can only be kicked against for so long. Much of life and history, and our place in it, seems to be a series of pendulum swings back and forth. Many have now reached that point where they have said, enough is enough and I just can’t do it anymore, or “I want you to hit me in the face as hard as you can.” Which is to say, they are seeking to express their masculinity in whatever ways they can through pushing against the femmy zeitgeist of our age. Being told to be more sensitive and gentle is one thing, chicks with dicks and trannies on the Bud Light can are steps to far. We don’t mind the roofies, we just want you to buy the drink.

How do we fix the problem? We swing the pendulum back. There is a Tranny on the Bud Light can and a man is the Women of the year, well, we have Jeremy’s Chocolate bars, sold in two varieties, SheHer and HeHim, one with nuts and one without…you guess which is which…and in response to the first gay president in Barack Obama, we get Donald Trump who let us all know that if you are in a position of power women will let you grab them by, you know, you know the thing.

One way or another, men are going to find a way to assert what they believe to be visible

attributes of masculinity. This can come through competition and combat, through one’s

relationship with the opposite sex, through a masculine physical appearance, through one’s strength and physical prowess, and diet, or if you will, brawls, boobs, beards, barbell’s and bacon. It should be noted, that this is not an exhaustive list. All of these are undirected forms of dominion, and one could even say that they are manifestations of masculinity in some way, but it’s a way that is devoid of context and often misguided.

The critic would hear what I just said and have a heart attack, and accuse me of promoting that which is toxic. How in the world could resulting to fisticuffs ever be a positive form of masculinity? The argument being that men are juvenile and should settle disputes in a more mature way like women do, like holding a grudge for fifty years and secretly trying to destroy one’s existence, which is obviously much healthier. It is true that the Scriptures rebuke the hot tempered, unstable man and one given to anger. Unstable men aren’t exerting masculinity, they are trainwrecks exerting the opposite. These men truly do suck, and are the worst people to be around. Self-control and self-discipline are chief attributes of masculinity and these guys exhibit none of that.

However, there is a time for peace and a time for war and war requires combat. Men have often engaged in sports that help them prepare for this, the modern day equivalent would be boxing, wrestling, ju-jitsu and the like. These things can all be participated in in a way that is upbuilding and not destructive, like beating the living crap out of each other. The goal being control, discipline and direction. That is, the honing of skills in order to protect and defend. This is dominion, not domination and needs to be taught. The way to teach this is through men. To call this impulse toxic is to guarantee more toxicity.

What about boobs? Isn’t even using the word boobs a sign of toxic masculinity? Would you prefer I use the word breasts?

“Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love. Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with a forbidden woman and embrace the bosom of an adulteress? For a man's ways are before the eyes of the LORD, and he ponders all his paths. The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is held fast in the cords of his sin. He dies for lack of discipline, and because of his great folly he is led astray.” Proverbs 5:15-23

Men will always be attracted to the female form as well they should be, and sexual intercourse has always been connected to becoming a man in some way. However, this was not simply the brute act of sex, for that was simply the outward manifestation of that which is truly masculine, namely, covenantal responsibility. That is, all of the fruit and enjoyment of the female form was to be enjoyed through marriage, through covenant which means taking up the mantle of sacrifice and responsibility. This is for the sake of dominion and not dominance. The way to teach this is through men. To call this impulse toxic is to guarantee more toxicity.

What about beards. It would seem as though beards are en vogue today, and I believe this is a subtle way of men asserting their masculinity in a culture gone mad. Look what I can do, that you can’t. One may point to the bearded lady, however, she is in the circus for a reason. One may even say that this is being discriminatory towards Asian men who have notoriously bad facial hair. However, I would defend my Asian brethren by saying that their bad facial hair is still leaps and bounds better than a juiced-up chick who has the facial hair of a fifteen-year-old boy.

It should also be noted, before we move on, that if a man treats his bread like a woman treats her hair than it doesn’t count. However, growing a beard is a most masculine things to do and has always been considered such and a form of coming of age for young men. To rip out one’s beard was the ultimate form of disrespect, like pantsing ones face. But growing a bread doesn’t make you a man, it is simply a sign that you are a male. However, if you are going to bear the sign of being a male you should at least act like a man. Just growing beard without assuming any form of sacrificial responsibility just makes you a boy who can shave.

What about barbells? Surely chicks can lift weights as well. Absolutely, they can but certainly not to the same end, and if they try to it is usually just gross. For example, when women lift weights or workout they are generally seeking to conform to a standard of beauty. To which, the endless barrage of butt and boob pics or videos from the gym, or just random pics from any location in “gym attire” which is now minimal and skintight can attest. The point being, women are seeking affirmation for their beauty. This is a perversion of what is nature, namely a woman wanting to be affirmed for her beauty. A women, seeking affirmation for her raw physical strength with the accompanying physique and man hands is disturbing. We used to be able to laugh about such things, and maybe still, however, it's probably wise to do so at a distance.

Don’t men also want to be perceived as being attractive? Sure, in a manner of speaking, no one wants to be butt ugly but when men share gym pics it is usually to receive affirmation for their strength, or their progress. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be strong. There is something primitive and unabashedly honest about lifting weights. You can either do it or you can’t. As Yoda would say, “there is either do or do not, there is no try.”

Strength in and of itself isn’t a bad thing. The Scriptures even say,

“The glory of young men is their strength, but the splendor of old men is their gray hair.” Proverbs. 20:29

As young men grow they want to assert their strength, and that’s not altogether bad, but to what end? You can lift stuff, but so what? Strength is not an end in and of itself. What are you doing with it? How does this make you a better protector and provided? What are you building with this strength?

The answer is not, I am a man because I can lift so much. The answer is, I am a man because I can use the strength that God has given me to a godly end and for a godly purpose. Again, the purpose or end is dominion and not dominance. To call a man’s desire for strength toxic is to guarantee masculine toxicity either through passive weak men or through men who use their strength for all the wrong ends. Also, if dudes are sharing are lifting pics, the question should be, why? Do you really think you’re inspiring others, or do you just need affirmation and guilty of the equivalent of the dude butt pic? One is o.k., I guess, but the other is more than a little gay.

What about bacon? I don’t feel much need to justify myself on this one. We are under the New Covenant now and bacon is delicious. However, given the universal obviousness of the deliciousness of bacon, why is it become somewhat funny for men to assert their love for bacon? Well, in some respects it’s because they’ve been told how bad it is for them and that one should refrain from eating it, because they will get fat and clog their arteries and have a heart attack and what not.

However, the eating of bacon is somewhat akin to the smoking of cigars and the drinking of whiskey. Although bacon is notoriously more delicious. Cigars and whiskey can be dangerous and have a bit of a bite to them, and with whiskey, particularly, outside of moderation can do a world of damage. However, being able to partake of something dangerous in a self-controlled and self-disciplined manner is a most masculine thing to do. But this is something to be guided and directed generally in the kinship of other men. Without that, it is just dangerous and destructive even though it should go without saying that bacon is always delicious.

Conclusion

If masculine strength is not directed, it is not as though it disappears. If masculine strength is directed in a feminine way it is not as though it becomes less dangerous. Chuck Palahniuk’s, Fight Club is about a generation of men raised by women, and have had enough and are trying to assert their masculinity in all the wrong ways. Wanting to assert and manifest one’s masculinity is a good thing, however one first has to know what it means to be a man. Try and assert or affirm your masculinity apart from a standard is like throwing a boomerang, it goes nowhere.

Palahniuk gives the warning at the beginning of the book to put the book down and to go out and prove you’re alive. How? By doing stuff. But apart from Christ, apart from a standard, a norm, an ideal, apart from a cause much bigger than one’s own preferences and desires, that will ultimately and inevitably lead to some form of destruction and dominance instead of an upbuilding dominion, which is painfully, not only evident in this book but also in our culture.

Again, in the end, it’s Christ or chaos.